Why a Quality Friendship is the Most Important

“My friends have made the story of my life” is such a powerful quote by Helen Keller. We can both agree that this statement could not be more true in soooo many ways. Friends have come in and out of our lives, however for us at least – the most important ones have been there for a long time and are here to stay.

IMG_0767

Looking back on our childhood, high school, and college days we can paint a picture of how our friends have impacted us in good and bad ways. How they have made us happy, made us cry and disappointed us; supported us through the toughest of times, and have just been a companion. Between all of those emotions and feelings, there have been friends that were short term, but for us, we remember the long term friends. The ones that you almost don’t even consider a friend, but more family. The ones who know you in and out; who will challenge you and might even drive you crazy, but at the end of the day, they are there for you.

IMG_0766

They are there to support you when no one else will. They feel your pain, understand your struggles, but will always make you laugh. Not just HA HA – but legit ground rolling belly laughs, until you almost pee your pants. And it doesn’t matter where you are – whether the floor of someone’s living room or in the middle of a club. You could sit in silence for hours or have the deepest conversation and they will get it. They understand you and they don’t judge you. They will offer the hardest, toughest advice because they know it is for your benefit. They know your worth and what you deserve. They are there for you and you are there for them.

Processed with VSCO with c3 preset

So what are these friends? These are QUALITY friends. These are the types of friends we choose to have because we value this support, it is like no other. It is different than a sibling or a mother even though the closeness seems the same. We choose these friends because we want them there for life – for the break ups, marriages, babies, deaths and losses. We want them there for the exciting and the tragic and guess what? They WANT to be there. No flakes here please!

So we choose QUALITY over QUANTITY. Because quantity to us seems transactional. It seems drama-filled (dare we say that?). It’s too much to keep up with, too many calls, too many problems, too many events. And everyone has a different role with quantity. There might be the going to dinner friend, the boy drama friend, the mall friend, the gym friend, the get wasted drunk friend, the every other month friend, the once a year friend. AH!!!!

Processed with VSCO with c3 preset

For us – we know that quality suits us. Why? Mostly because we are quality friends to each other but also because we have found over the years that our quality friends have been the best of our friends. They are every type of friend in one. They provide the best memories, the best support and have no expectations in return. OUR friends have made (and continue to make) the story of our lives.

Xo Sass and Sweetness

Our Friendship

Processed with VSCO with c3 preset

For those who don’t know us – we are Christie and Samantha or Sass and Sweetness! We are besties that grew up together, literally our moms were pregnant at the same time and we are exactly 29 days apart (Sweetness the older one – holla!). Our childhood was ordinary in the sense that we grew up with loving parents, had an abundance of toys, and took gymnastics lessons. What was extraordinary about our childhood was the confidence we had as kids and imaginations that were unlike any other.

Processed with VSCO with c3 preset

As kids we often went to “Camp Mom-mom and Pop-pop”… which is code for our parents wanted to go out so they would send us to Christie’s grandparents house. There were no ordinary rules here though and we could use our imaginations to the fullest! We built forts with all of the couch cushions, transformed the living room into the Beverly Hills Restaurant with fake food and dining tables, and went to the nearby park to perform shows on the outdoor stage in front of total strangers… all with no shame. We also “ruled” the playground at our Elementary school – walking around like total #girlbosses. If only we could have bottled that confidence up and sprinkled it on us as we got older!

Processed with VSCO with c3 preset

We were inseparable as kids, until our parents moved to different towns and that relationship started to change. Not in a bad way, but we didn’t see each other every.single.day like we did before. New friendships were made, new experiences were had. Sass went to an all girl’s private high school where Friday nights consisted of PG-13 movies with friends in the basement and Sweetness… let’s just say she had a much different experience. We always “stayed in touch” but our relationship transitioned more into “cousin” type of friends. We saw each other for family events and always picked up where we left off, but weren’t calling each other when there was some drama with a boy or if we wanted to go to the mall.

Processed with VSCO with c3 preset

As we moved through college and life as of today, our relationship has changed back to what it was before! With so many of our close friends getting married (including Sass), we have been able to get together more often than we were before since we lived in different states. When we both relocated back to NJ and decided to start this blog, our imaginations have sparked again and we are back to our silly, weird old selves.

…Okay well there are some hesitations with that prior statement… because of LIFE and ADULTING ughhhh. We both recently went through some drastic changes – Sass is newly married with a baby and Sweetness is newly single and moved back to NJ from the West Coast. Things have been tough at times, it’s not always the rule the playground type of days we had back in our childhood, however we are pushing to work through it all. We are now there for each other in a different type of way. You won’t see us building forts anymore in the middle of the living room (well if that was acceptable we probably would) but we always have each other’s back no matter the situation. We know this type of friendship is rare and we are incredibly grateful that despite all of the changes we have experienced, we still continue to be the best of friends!

Do you have a friendship similar to this? We would love to hear about it below!

Xo Sass and Sweetness

How To Be a Great Father

Processed with VSCO with hb1 preset

Processed with VSCO with hb1 preset

This Father’s Day is a little extra special for Sass as this is the first time I am celebrating my husband as a father. I am fortunate enough to have had amazing examples of what a wonderful father is throughout my entire life but how I relate to what it means to be a father has taken on a different meaning now as a mother rather than simply a daughter.

Being a great father is all of the things everyone always says – father’s should be attentive, nurturing, loving, supportive, moral, etc etc, however, this father’s day I am going to go ahead and say that being a great father starts with being a great husband. Now, being a great husband is going to mean different things to different people but I’m going to share my 5 and a ½ months experience on this and how I came to believe it.

During the first few months of parenthood it is pretty easy to do right by your kid. I’m not saying that by any means it has been easy being a new parent but basically as long as she is fed, rested, burped, changed, and bathed she’s pretty happy and healthy. When you think of it as simply as that, as long as those things are happening you are a great parent.

Now in my house I generally do more of the feeding, burping, changing, and bathing because that is how we have it set up and what we have agreed upon. My husband definitely does a fair share of the duties but considering I am with her all day and most of the night before he gets home from work, one of the best ways he can be a great parent to her is by making sure that I am fed, rested, bathed, perhaps not burped and changed, but you get the picture!

When you become a mom your needs become secondary and I can’t tell you how wonderful it is when my husband responds to my needs when I am unable to do so for myself. Especially really early on when I was breastfeeding around the clock, my body was recovering, and I was extremely sleep deprived. There is no time to breathe, eat, bathe, or make a phone call let alone care about what’s for dinner! He was so great about stepping in when I couldn’t hold my head up, when I was breaking down in overwhelmed tears, and about ordering me to eat even when I didn’t have the energy to. Nowadays, he gives me time to see when my friends when possible or take a few hours to run errands….by myself 🙂

I’ve come to learn that being a great father can mean knowing when to not start a fight with mama! It’s giving mama a break when she needs it, sending her to get her nails done, or making dinner. Being a great father is letting mom off the hook when he’s out of clean socks or when our routine doesn’t go as planned. My husband is a great father to our baby girl and I am happy to say that that is in part because he is a great husband to me. 

I wanted to give him a few things to let him know how great of a job he’s doing taking care of his girls! My husband speaks Spanish fluently and we definitely want our daughter to learn so I found a really cool website that makes personalized books in Spanish. The site adds in his picture and all three of our names to the pages of a story about a little girl and her daddy. It’s too cute and he can’t wait to read it to her! (The books can also be personalized in English!)

Processed with VSCO with hb1 preset

Processed with VSCO with hb1 preset

Knowing that we would be traveling to see my husband’s two brothers and many cousins this weekend, I thought a game would be perfect! These guys play more games when they get together than the kids do! They are so competitive but always have a great time. I picked up Bean Bag Bucketz from Dick’s Sporting Goods. There are four ways to play this game but I am certain that no matter how they play it will turn into a drinking game LOL. I’ll post some videos to our stories of them in action!

Processed with VSCO with hb1 preset

Processed with VSCO with hb1 preset

My husband LIVES in tech shirts! He lounges in them, works out in them, cooks in them, and even goes out in them on occasion. They are the perfect shirt for him because he is a pretty big guy and these allow him to move and be active without any restraint! The material is perfect! I picked up a couple of new Under Armour Tech Shirts from Dick’s Sporting Goods – they are even on sale right now!

Processed with VSCO with hb1 preset

And lastly, my husband loves his Qalo ring but lost it and needed another one! If your husband resists wearing a ring because it’s uncomfortable or because his type of work makes it dangerous or annoying to have metal on his finger YOU NEED A QALO. What is it? It is a silicon wedding band, as seen on Steph Curry, Sam Hung, Bryce Harper, and many others! They are very functional, my husband can barely feel that it’s on! We call it his “work ring” because I still like him to wear his nice wedding band for special occasions or a Saturday night out (because those have become special occasions too)! There are many color and personalization options that you are sure to find something he likes, you can even create your own! And the best part is, when he leaves it at the gym, it’s only $20-30 to replace! Woo!

Processed with VSCO with hb1 preset

Processed with VSCO with hb1 preset

So keep some of these gift ideas in mind for next year or for his birthday and we hope all of the dads have a wonderful Father’s Day today!

SaveSaveSaveSave

SaveSave